Behind Blue Eyes
by AshxBlackxWolf
Summary: After living with the Tennysons for a few weeks, Devlin finds his depression getting worse. He turns to cutting as a way of taking the pain away, but when Kenny finds out he's determined to Take Devlin's pain away no matter what. NOT SLASH
1. Slit Wrist Theory

**This is my first fanfic and I noticed there weren't many Ben 10 fics about Devlin, so here's mine! YAY! Hopefully it's good.^^**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ben 10... **

The knife glistened in the sunlight that streamed from the window as Devlin washed it in the sink. Drops of water slid down the silver metal, making Devlin mesmerized by them. He lowered his head a little, his long black bangs falling into his deep blue eyes. His depression had somehow gotten worse even though he now had a family that cared for him and loved him. It was probably the nightmares, they'd happened almost every night for the past few weeks he'd moved in with the Tennysons. Visions of past memories that he'd rather forget came back to him in rush and make him wake up gasping for air in a cold sweat. Devlin slowly rolled up his sleeve until it was up a few inches above his elbow.

'_Just do it. You'll feel better. You don't want keep feeling like this…' _the eleven year old thought and he slowly put the knife to his soft, pale flesh. He looked at the other scabs that were beginning to heal and the long pink scars. He was just about to slash the knife against his skin when he heard footsteps coming down the stairs followed by a loud voice calling his name.

"DEEEVLIIIN!"

He sighed and unrolled his sleeve quickly and started drying the knife. Kenny walked into the kitchen and went over to his best friend and brother.

"What's up?" the brunette asked. Devlin shrugged and replied, "Washing dishes."

"Hm… well you better get ready for school, wait, how long have you been up?" Kenny turned his head toward Devlin who shrugged again.

"Since….five or four in the morning." He replied and Kenny's eyes almost bugged out of his skull. "And you're still going to school? Aren't you tired?" he said incredulously and Devlin shook his head.

Kenny blinked and shook his head he grabbed Devlin's arm and pulled him out of the kitchen.

"Hey! Let go- I wasn't done-" Devlin cut himself off as Kenny shoved his backpack at him and tugged on his arm again, leading him out of the house. "Common, we're gonna be late and you don't want to miss your first day at school, do you?" he said with a grin. "Never thought I'd see the day you actually wanted to go to school." Devlin said, tugging on his arm to get it back and winced slightly. Kenny let go of him and just walked next to him, chatting away as usual and Devlin spaced off after listening for a few minutes.

He wondered what school was going to be like, if he was going to make at least another friend. Or if he didn't, if they wouldn't think he was a freak that belong there.

'_You don't. They won't accept you. What makes you think they would? Not even your own father accepted you.'_

'Shut up…' Devlin thought, shutting his eyes closed, but the voice in his head continued.

'_You're just a freak. Those scars are proof. Imagine if everyone found out, than you'd really be a freak-'_

"SHUT UP!" Devlin shouted out loud, his eyes shut tightly and his hands gripping his head, trembling slightly. Kenny stared at him in disbelief, his green eyes widened.

"I'm sorry… You could've just told me if I was annoying you." He said going over to his friend. He tilted his head to one side and blinked. "Is something wrong?" he added. Devlin snapped his eyes open and shook his head while rubbing his arms.

"No, no. Nothing's wrong. I'm just fine, um, just a little nervous. Sorry…" he lied, starring at the side walk. Kenny's face broke into a grin and he put and arm around Devlin's neck. "Don't worry about it. School's not that bad, except the homework. And the teachers. And the classes." He said, going back to his usually talkative self. Devlin nodded and replied, "That just leaves lunch and that recess thing you told me about." Kenny's grin widened. "Exactly."

* * *

"See? We have the same class so it won't be that bad." Kenny said after their stop at the office and now going down the hall to the classroom. Devlin nodded and adjusted the black backpack strap on his shoulder. Even if Kenny was there with him, he still felt awkward and the other kids that stared at him as he walked down the hall weren't helping either. Not to mention he was trying to ignore the voice in his head and not burst out like earlier this morning. Then others would really think he was a freak.

Once they opened the door to the class, the bell rang and other people were slowly starting to come in. Kenny led Devlin to the teacher and handed her a note from the office that they picked up. She read it over before standing up and looking at the seating chart and saying that Devlin was to sit in the empty desk next to Kenny in the back of the class, to both of their relief. They went over to their seats and the teacher started writing what they were supposed to do for the day. She also announced to the rest of the class about Devlin, but thankfully didn't make him introduce himself and make him do something ridiculous, like tell them what his hobbies were. If they wanted to know, they could ask Devlin themselves.

He tried to pay attention for the first few lessons before lunch, but his mind kept wandering and he even fell asleep at one point in class. Just as he was on the verge of unconsciousness, he heard giggles of the two girls that sat a row ahead of them and opened one eye at them, seeing that they were glancing back at him and Kenny, whispering some things to each other and blushing a slightly. Devlin rolled his eyes and put his head on the desk on his arms and closed his eyes again.

'_They wouldn't act like that if they actually knew you…'_

Devlin almost groaned in irritation and replied back to the voice, 'Just leave me alone.'

'_But you know it's true. They'd think you were a freak and shun you.'_

'Please stop…'

'_Once everyone finds out, no one will want you around. They'll send you in an insane asylum or just kick you out.'_

'Stop…' Tears started silently forming at the corners of Devlin's eyes as he dug his fingernails into his arm. He felt stinging pain as he started scrapping them slowly across his pale skin. Strangely it made him feel better, like he was taking the pain all out of his body. His fingernails found the previous, healing marks and he dug his nails in them, hard. He willed the tears to stop and his mind went blank. Suddenly, just as he was about to dig nails further into his skin, he heard the ringing of the bell and everyone get out of their seats. He looked up and blinked, Kenny standing next to him.

"Are you sure you're ok?" he asked, looking a little concerned. Devlin nodded and got up. Kenny led him to the lunchroom and introduced him to his other friends. They asked him a few questions, which he answered and they seemed to accept him. After that school just went by and finally, much to Devlin's relief, he and Kenny were walking home together.

"Are you sure you're ok?" he asked for the millionth time that day.

"For the last time, yes." Devlin sighed, now getting frustrated by it.

"Look, I know I'm being annoying. And I know you're probably ready to kill me because of it, but I just want to know what's wrong. You've been acting really weird lately and even Dad has been noticing. You've been spacing out more than you normally do and you have random outbursts and you haven't been the same." He said, stopping and standing in front of Devlin and looking at him with concerned, emerald green eyes staring into deep, dark blue ones. There was an awkward silence before Devlin managed a fake smile and said, "I'm fine. Honestly. It's just-"

"Stop lying to me Dev! I know something is wrong with you, but your being too stubborn to admit it! Will you please, PLEASE, just tell me so I help you?" Kenny interrupted him, raising his voice which made Devlin wince slightly and look down at the concrete. He unconsciously started rubbing his arm.

He shook his head, making his black bangs swish into his eyes. "It's nothing…" he whispered more to himself and tried to believe himself. He started to walk past Kenny but when he was barely two inches away, Kenny turned around and grabbed Devlin's arm, tightly. He was just about to start yelling at his friend when Devlin let out a gasp in pain and surprise and winced. Kenny looked at his arm and pulled the sleeve up. He stared in silence at red, angry lines that stood out against his brother's pale skin. He took his eyes away from them and looked into Devlin's with a mixture of emotions.

"Devlin….you've be cutting yourself…?"

* * *

**Poor Dev...I didn't mean to make him slighty schizophrenic too, but my friend gave me that idea. **

**Please review! ^^**

**~Ash**


	2. Whispers In The Dark

**Disclaimer: I don't own Ben 10, or the songs used in this chapter. Sadly.**

'_Pain, without love_

_Pain, can't get enough_

_Pain, I like it rough_

'_Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all…'_

Devlin couldn't agree more as the music blasted through the headphones and ears. He put the volume on full blast and closed his eyes as he lied on his bed. His room was dark with the blinds closed and the curtains over them. He sighed and let the music drift him to his own world and escape the reality of what happened that afternoon.

* * *

"_Devlin…you've been cutting yourself…?" Kenny said in a quiet voice. Devlin said nothing back for a while until he finally looked up at Kenny through his bangs, his eyes emotionless._

"_Yes. Yes I have."_

_There was a long and tense silence between the two boys. Kenny was looking back and forth between the marks on his best friend's arm and His best friend himself, who was staring into oblivion. Kenny could see his eyes glistening with unshed tears through his hair._

"_Why?" he finally asked. Kenny thought Devlin wouldn't answer, but to his surprise he turned to him sharply, his eyes blazing and the tears falling down his face._

"_Because I'm a nobody that no one likes or wants around! You wouldn't understand though because you've had a perfect life with parents who actually care about you! You've never know what it's like to be taken away because your father's in jail and your mother's dead! You've never been hurt so many times that you wish your foster father would just kill you and get over with it! You've never cried your eyes out all night and have to go through it all again the next day! You just don't know…" He screamed at Kenny and held his gaze with brunette, whose green eyes were wide with shock, before looking away and sitting on the sidewalk and wrapping his arms around his knees that he pulled close to his chest and buried his face into his knees._

_Kenny blinked and realized Devlin was muttering to himself like he was agreeing with someone and he was shaking like crazy. Kenny thought for a minute and sat next to him, he stayed quiet for another moment before turning to Devlin. He reached over and gently touched his friend's shaking shoulder. He thought of something to say, but nothing came to mind until Devlin spoke up._

"_It's not like I cut deep enough to kill myself…just enough until I bleed…" he said in a barely audible voice. Kenny nodded, not knowing what to do and listened as Devlin continued._

"_It's like bleeding the pain out… I feel better when I cut. Like I've just gotten rid of some of the pain that I feel and there's less than there was before. But more keeps coming back, so I try to cut it all out again."_

_Kenny waited for him to finish before saying, "You said nobody liked or wanted you. So what does that make me? And Dad? And everyone else?" Devlin had no answer for that and stared at the ground again, rubbing his arms._

"_We like you and if we didn't want you, Dev, Mom and Dad wouldn't have even adopted you." Kenny said, looking at Devlin's face. He nodded silently and Kenny continued._

"_Do you like to feel like this? Wouldn't you rather just live on with your life without being sad all the time?" Devlin looked at him nodded again. But then he widened his eyes and frantically said, "Where are you going with this? You're going to tell Ben and then you'll send me off to see a shrink or lock me in an insane asylum, aren't you?" _

_Kenny shook his head. "No, I won't. I won't tell anyone." He said._

_Devlin narrowed his eyes. "How do I know you're not lying to me?" Kenny frowned a little but gave him a small smile and raised his pinky. "I promise I won't tell. But, I will help you feel better so you can be happy and I absolutely won't tell anyone. Promise." He said. Devlin stared at Kenny and blinked, not knowing what to do. Finally, he hesitantly and slowly linked his pinky with Kenny's. "Ok…" he said and Kenny smiled at him._

* * *

Devlin sighed and turned onto his side. He opened his eyes and stared at the wall and blinked back tears as another song came up on his music player.

'_To fell hurt, to feel lost_

_To be left out in the dark_

_To be kicked when you're down_

_To feel like you've been pushed around_

_To be on the edge of breaking down and no one's there to save you_

_No you don't know what it's like_

_Welcome to my life.'_

Devlin hugged his pillow close to him and let out a shaky breath as he felt the corners of his eyes prickle with tears. It was already sometime around eleven at night and he still couldn't sleep. He listened to the music player that Ben and the rest of the family had given to him as a Welcome-To-The-Family present. He greatly appreciated it, since his music player was the one object he really couldn't live without.

He was nervous about what Kenny was going to try to do. Maybe he actually did tell Ben and they were planning on taking him to a shrink.

'But he promised...,' Devlin thought, 'He wouldn't break a promise…'

'_Everyone breaks promises.' _The voice said.

'Leave me alone, please.'

'_He'll betray you like everyone else you've known. He's lying to you.'_

'I said leave me alone.'

'_You're just hurting yourself in the end.'_

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" Devlin shouted at the top of his lungs in his pillow that he hugged tighter and buried his face in the pillow.

"Leave me alone…leave me alone…leave me alone…" he sobbed into his pillow and he curled up in a tight ball and just kept whispering to the voice to leave him alone. He shakily pulled his dark grey comforter over his shoulder and hugged his pillow even tighter. He scratched at his bare arms, but this time just a normal scratch, too distressed to make actual harm to himself. He let the tears leak out of his eyes and buried his face even further into the soft, feathery pillow.

'_Cry all you want, I'm still here Devlin.'_

"Go away! You're ruining my life! Just go away and leave me alone!" Devlin shouted into the pillow again he plugged his ears with his hands. He stayed that way for a few minutes until his sobs reduced to sniffling and hiccups and he wiped his tears streaked face. He pulled the headphones out of his ears and sat up in bed. He got up and wrapped the comforter around his shoulders and grabbed his pillow then walked out of his room.

He carefully and quietly walked down the stairs and walked into the living room and put his pillow on the couch. He then walked into the kitchen and from then on it was just a blur that he didn't remember. He grabbed the closest knife and reached him arm over the sink and turned the faucet on. Devlin put the knife to his arm and made careful, small line across his skin. Satisfied by the familiar stinging pain, he kept making more and carving into his skin. Water washed away the blood that was dripping from his pale skin and when he was done, he washed the knife in the water and turned the faucet off quietly. His dark blue eyes were expressionless as he stared at the bloody lines on his skin.

'LEAVE ME ALONE'

A smile danced across Devlin's lips and he turned the faucet on again and kept his arm under the cool water, then he wrapped his arm up in the bandages he found under the sink and picked up his comforter and went back to the living room and laid down on the couch. He closed his eyes and let out a quiet, small chuckle before snuggling into his blanket and pillow and falling into a deep, dreamless sleep.

* * *

**There it is, Chapter 2 of 'Behind Blue Eyes'. I was kinda stuck on writing this chapter.**

**Please review! ^^**

**~Ash 8D**


	3. Breaking The Habit

**Chapter 3! YAY! A little bit longer than the rest, but I had a lot to write this time. ;) And now...for review resondings!**

**AM83220~ Thanks!^^ It's because I want to make Dev's life miserable and like to watch him suffer! MUHAHA! JK, I love Devvies! XD I just thought he needed a depressing story about him. 'Cause I'm nice that way.^^**

**Skylark Evanson~ I knowz. Meany Voices in his head... But not to worry! They'll go away! Eventually...**

**Arianne 888~ Thanks for the support! ^^ I thought Devvie needed a depressing fic and be just a little psychotic. He is Kevvie's son after all. Haha... *gets B slapped by Kevin* T.T I deserved that...**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing except Phoenix. :D**

"Jesus Christ, Dev, your arms look like you ran a lawn mower down them." Kenny swore, shaking his head slightly as he dabbed at Devlin's arms with alcohol in the bathroom. Devlin hissed in pain and tried to jerk his arm back, but Kenny held it tightly and continued dabbing at the scarlet marks. He was very disappointed in his friend. Mostly because Devlin had told him he'd try to stop after he found out, then the next day he sees fresh cuts and the words 'LEAVE ME ALONE' freaking engraved into his skin. He wrapped the arm he was working on in bandages from elbow to wrist and began dabbing the other arm with alcohol.

Devlin was sitting on the edge of the tub and he winced as the alcohol stung his cuts. He was staring at the tiled floor and felt like he was being scolded by a parent. "I know." He said feebly. Kenny finished up wrapping the other arm and he stood up and held out his hand.

"Give me any sharp or pointy things that you have." He said sternly.

Devlin looked up at him and without thinking asked, "Why?"

"Give 'em. Now."

Devlin hesitated before slowly reaching into the pocket of his grey plaid pajamas and he pulled out a razor blade. He ran his finger over the blade ever so gently, so it wouldn't cut him and he finally put the razor in Kenny's hand. Kenny put it in his pocket.

"You sleep with this thing in your pocket? Where the hell do you even get these?"

"Hardware store. They have bags full of them."

"Wait, you have a bag full of these things?"

Devlin looked away and mumbled quietly, "No…" He fumbled with his hands and took a sudden interest in the bathroom walls.

"Show me and hand them over." Devlin sighed and stood up. He led Kenny to his room and he pulled open the small droor and dug through it again before pulling out a medium sized, new bag full of razors. Kenny snatched them out of his hands and said, "Anything else?" Devlin shook his head.

"Good. Get ready for school." He said before leaving. Kenny went downstairs, being already fully dressed, and threw away all of the razors, but carefully hid them so no one would see and ask questions. He got out a bowl and poured his cereal and then started eating. He thought about how he was going to find some help for Devlin. He already had a plan for the cutting problem, but he had no idea about his schizophrenia.

Kenny looked up some treatments for it, but that would require either therapy or medication. Therapy would probably be way too expensive for a ten and an eleven year old. Maybe he could see the school counselor like Kenny had planned for him. Besides, he promised he wouldn't tell anyone else and if Devlin wanted to, he could tell someone. Kenny didn't think that was going to happen and he wasn't going to break a promise to his best friend who was already an emotional wreck.

Finally, Devlin came back down stairs fully dressed in his usual dark clothes which consisted of black Converse, black jeans, and a long sleeved black shirt. He scratched lightly at his arms and said, "These bandages are really itchy." Kenny suddenly ran up to him and slapped his hand. Devlin pulled his hand back immediately and stopped scratching.

"If you keep scratching at them, people will notice. Plus, the bandages will come loose." Kenny said, matter-of-factly. Devlin nodded and grabbed his backpack and started walking out of the house. "Common, we'll be late." He said.

"Wait!" Kenny quickly grabbed his backpack and an apple before going after him. He finally caught up to Devlin and handed him the apple. "Eat this."

"Why?" Devlin raised an eyebrow at him.

"Because I don't want you starving yourself, too." Kenny replied and Devlin flinched a little and took it. He took a small bite out of it and swallowed. "What exactly do you have in mind? For me, I mean."

Kenny sighed and thought for a minute. "I'm thinking, since therapy is too expensive and we don't want to tell Dad or Mom, The counselor at the school is probably your best bet." He said and Devlin nodded slightly. They had a long, long pause.

"What if it doesn't work?" Devlin said in a quiet voice and he kept his gaze on the ground. Kenny looked at him and stared. Finally he said, "It will. You just need to believe you can."

"You stole that from a movie, huh?" Devlin said with a small smile forming on his face. Kenny smiled back and laughed. "Maybe" he shrugged and they kept walking to the school.

It was already lunchtime and Kenny was standing with Devlin in front of the counselor's office, who was currently in the room with another student. Devlin was rubbing his arms nervously and kept looking around the hall.

"Dev, calm down. What could possibly go wrong?" Kenny said. Devlin turned to him franticly.

"Shh! Don't say that! Haven't you seen any movies? Every time someone says that, the worst possible thing happens! Like, someone gets eaten…or something." he said.

"Of course I have, but those are just movies alright? Nothing bad is going to happen. And nothing will eat you. Just breathe alright?" Kenny said, reassuringly. Devlin sighed and nodded. He ran a hand through his bangs and tugged on his sleeves until Kenny slapped them and Devlin put his hands down. They both looked over as the door opened revealing a girl about their age with black hair that had bangs covering one of her light grey eyes. She had the tips of her shoulder length hair dyed red and had on a black t shirt with fishnet sleeves. She had a black leather sweat band on her left wrist and a red and black checkered one on her right. She wore a black skirt that was above the knees by an inch with a studded belt around her hips and tilted to one side. To complete her attire, she had black combat boots that reached to the top of her calves.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Phoenix." A voice, the counselor's, said from inside the room. The girl, Phoenix, nodded and said nonchalantly, "Yup. See ya," before the door closed. She sighed and turned to the boys who were staring at her. "Bitch, thinkin' she knows my life…" she muttered to herself out loud. "Have fun, it's a fucking party in there." She said directed to the boys before walking off and putting some buds in her ears and drowning out the world in music. The boys sat in silence for a long time.

"Well, she's just a ray of sunshine and fluffy ponies…" Kenny said, laughing. Devlin smiled a little and the door opened again, announcing that the counselor was ready to see him. He got up nervously and Kenny practically pushed him into the room.

Needless to say, it was tiny. There was a small desk with a laptop and stacks of papers, all that teacher stuff. There were toys and puppets, most likely for the younger kids that visited, and a white board with Expo marker's and an eraser. The was books everywhere, motivational ones, psychology ones, 'understanding children' ones, that kind of stuff along with poster's that were the same thing. The counselor was sitting in a chair, writing something down. She looked up at Devlin and gave him a gentle smile. "Hello, my name is Miss. Gates. Please, have a seat." She said kindly. Devlin closed the door before sitting in a soft, small couch across from her. He watched as she adjusted her glasses and folded her hands on her lap. "Now then, let's start with names. Since you already know mine, what's yours?" she asked and Devlin answered. She nodded and crossed her legs. "So, is there anything on your mind? Something you'd like to just come out and say?"

Devlin raised an eyebrow and said, "Don't you know already?"

Miss. Gates shook her head. "You could tell me if you want to."

Devlin nodded but said, "I'd rather not…just yet."

"That's understandable. Well in that case, what do you want to talk about?"

Devlin shrugged. "I don't know…."

"How do you feel?" Miss. Gates said suddenly. Devlin thought about that a little before answering.

"Nervous, and…"

"And…?"

A long silence.

"…scared." Devlin admitted. "Is there anything that you think why you'd be feeling this?"

'Duh… that's why I'm here.' Devlin thought but really said nothing. Miss. Gates waited patiently and watched him.

"My friend, well brother, but still friend, sort of…found out something about me."

"Brother?" Miss. Gates asked as if she never heard such a thing.

"Adopted actually." Devlin replied. Miss. Gates nodded and said, "Is he adopted?"

"I am. He was just my friend before, but…yeah. I've been living there for a few weeks already."

"Do you like them, you're family?" Miss. Gates said, brushing her blonde bangs from her face.

Devlin nodded and said, "They're nice to me. More than anyone else has, which is good. I guess. But… I'm not so sure they will anymore if they found out…"

Miss. Gates sat on the edge of her seat. "Found out what, Sweetie?" she said gently, almost coaxingly to find out what he was going to say. Devlin inhaled and exhaled a deep breath before rolling up his sleeve and unraveling the bandages to show her the angry red and jagged lines that criss- crossed on his arms. He looked at the carpet and waited for Miss. Gates to gasp or rush him to the nurse's office or call his parents to send him off to a nuthouse, but she said nothing. She did nothing, but stared at them like she'd seen this a million times before and it was no big deal.

"I-I don't want to kill myself… I'd never do that. I just… it's relieving. It makes me feel better knowing that I can feel something than nothing." Devlin said, surprised by how small and pathetic his voice sounded. "But… ever since he found out, and how upset he was, I… I want to stop. It's not worth to hurt myself when it hurts others too…" He didn't dare to look up at Miss. Gates though. He didn't want to see the expression on her face, whether good or bad.

Miss. Gates though, was smiling at him approvingly. "That's good. You're choice to stop willing shows that you're a brave kid." Her smile fell as she heard a barely audible sniffle come from Devlin whose head was bowed down, bangs covering his face. "What's wrong?" Miss. Gates asked gently, pushing a tissue box to him.

"I'm not…." Devlin whispered quietly. "I'm not brave at all… If I was, I would've fought back all those times instead of letting them hit me… If I was I wouldn't have done any of this in the first place…" he lowered his head more and gingerly touched his cuts.

"Who's 'them'?" Miss. Gates asked her voice soft.

Devlin didn't answer and after five minutes of saying nothing, Miss. Gates just let it go, knowing he wasn't going to say. By then she could see Devlin visibly trembling and he had his arms around himself like he was cold. He had his eyes shut tight with silent tears leaking out of the corners. He felt pathetic, crying in front of teacher of all things. Maybe it's the whole 'counselor+ talking about pasts= crying' thing he thought actually happened at these things from TV and movies was actually true and he fell right into that trap. Yeah, that was probably it.

Devlin felt her sit next to him on the couch and next thing he knew, she lifted his head up so that he was looking right at her. She was smiling at him, in the kind and encouraging way. Not the sympathetic, pitying way. "I think, you just don't believe you are. You have low confidence, I can tell, but it's ok. I was like you, too. I let people push me around and I felt like I couldn't do anything about it. Am I right?" she said. Devlin nodded a little, knowing that sometimes it wasn't true. Especially if someone got him mad enough, than that sorry sucker would've been headed into the hospital. He admitted to himself though, that he did actually have low confidence in himself.

"We'll try to fix that then." Miss. Gates said, taking his arm and gently ran her fingers down it, from elbow to wrist. They both watched as the skin started molding together and slowly they all formed together, now just pale scars that almost blended in with Devlin's actual skin tone. She let go of his arm and took his other, doing the same thing until both of his arms cut free and just scars that were barely noticeable.

"Now I know I'm supposed to tell someone about these kinds of things, but it'll just be our secret. Alright?" Miss. Gates said, giving Devlin a sly smile and winked at him. Devlin pulled his sleeves down and wiped his eyes on them before giving her a small smile back. Miss. Gates stood up and walked to her desk, fumbling around. She finally turned back to Devlin and held out her hand. In it was a rubber band. A plain, simple, average rubber band. Devlin raised an eyebrow at her, obviously confused.

"It's for when you feel you need to cut." Miss Gates said, laughing a little and holding out the band to him. Devlin lifted his hand for it, but Miss. Gates put it around his wrist. "Just snap it when you feel the need to. Either that or do something to get your mind off of it. Run, draw, write, scream in a pillow, anything." She said, pulling the band slightly and letting it go so it snapped against Devlin's wrist, but not enough to hurt him.

Devlin nodded and pulled his sleeve over the rubber band and stood up. "So, when do I come back here again?" he asked.

"Whenever you want or need to talk to me. It can be everyday if you want, during lunch?" Miss. Gates offered and Devlin nodded with a smile. "Then see you tomorrow, Devlin." Miss. Gates said, smiling back at him as he walked out of the door.

Kenny was waiting for him and he stood up once he was Devlin walking toward him. "How'd it go?"

"Good." Devlin simply said and started walking away down the hall.

"Awesome. Now let's go. I'm starving and the lunch room has pizza." Kenny grabbed his friend's arm and half dragged him to the smell of melted cheese.

* * *

**THE END! For now... Hope that was better than the last two, 'cause I re-read them I thought they sucked terribly. DX As awlways, Review PLLLLEEEEEAAAAASSSSEEEEEEE! Or I kill Devvie in the next chapter! No JK I wouldn't do that. I'm not that mean to someone so cute and psychotic. ^^**

**~ASH**


	4. I'm a Fake

**I'm baaaack! Sorry it took me so long to update, I had school and marching band practice out the yin yang. So I'll probably not update for a while, or until marching season ends. Which is November/ December-ish. The only reason I'm updating now is because it's raining, I'm getting a cold because of the rain, my internet connection sucks, I'm done with my homework, and I just remembered about this. I'm such a procrastinator… REVIEW TIME!**

**Kurozaki: Haha...yesh he is...**

******Arianne: ****Yey! I'm good at being a crazy person's voice! I feel so accomplished...don't worry, I will never stop updating this fic until I think it's finished! I don't know when that will be... Oh well. The time will come.**

**Anyways… Disclaimer time! I wish I owned Ben 10. But I don't. Because if I did it'd probably become very depressing at one point or another. And people would die. A lot. Oh and I don't own Bleach.**

"Let me see your arms." Devlin sighed as he held out his arms lazily out in front of Kenny for 'Weekly Inspections', a little something Kenny decided to do ever since Devlin's first trip to the counselor at school. That was a month ago. Needless to say, Devlin was starting to get tired of Kenny's nagging and constant questions and inspections. He understood he was just concerned for him but when he forced Devlin to allow him to inspect him in case he was cutting somewhere else on his body in only his boxers at 3 in the morning was ridiculous.

"Alright, you're good." Kenny said, giving Devlin's arm back, who was muttering something about ripping Kenny's spine out and choking him with it. Kenny didn't doubt he would do that. Especially since just the other day Devlin took his anger out on a poor kid who called him emo in school. That kid was currently in the hospital with a broken arm and leg and several fractured ribs. Luckily though, no one knew it was Devlin. Sneaky child…. "Just shut up and do your homework."

"Don't tell me what to do." Devlin said, flicking a marshmallow at his brother. He turned his attention back to his math homework, which he had no idea how to do. Who honestly cares what X equals? He sighed and decided to just give up entirely and write down the answers tomorrow in class while the teacher went over answers. He put his things away and grabbed the bag of marshmallows and started eating one at a time by pulling in half and nibbling on the inside part of one half and when he finished that he'd just eat the other half normally. This kid had such weird eating habits.

"Can't you eat anything without pulling it apart? You know, like a normal person?" Kenny asked watching him and raising an eyebrow. "You forget that I'm not normal." Devlin simply replied and kept eating his snacks. Kenny shrugged it off, knowing the statement was most likely true in the first place. Technically both weren't exactly normal, but let's not get into that. "Will it be too much of a distraction if I watch TV?" Devlin asked politely, and Kenny just shrugged. Taking that as a yes, Devlin took the changer and turned on the huge flat screen. He surfed channels for a few moments before he found Bleach re-run and decided to watch it. He'd already seen this episode so many times, but it was better than everything on. Devlin loved Bleach just oh-so-much. Once he spent four whole days just watching every single episode online with no sleep at all and running only on Coffee and sweets, which made him very jittery and giggly and raised a lot of questions from many people and a slightly concerned Ben. One thing Kenny learned from that day, never try to pull a sleep deprived, and super hyper Devlin away from the watching Bleach on the computer. It ends in having a black eye, a broken lamp, and a golf club.

"You're going to be one of those anime nerds, aren't you?" Kenny asked eyeing him closely. Devlin shrugged in that 'I don't know, maybe' kind of ways. "Is that a bad thing?" Devlin asked, glancing over at him with a raised eyebrow before turning back to the screen and watching attentively. "I don't really care. Just wondering." Kenny replied, closing his textbook and stealing the marshmallows away before Devlin had another sugar rush and broke something. Devlin pulled up his knees to his chest and wrapped his arms around them with his chin on his knees. "I'm not a nerd just because I don't like what everybody else does. Besides it's interesting… Japanese animation is much more interesting than American." Devlin stated in a calm tone. Kenny looked from him to the TV screen. "I didn't mean it like that. If you like it than whatever." He said and looked back at the screen. Devlin didn't answer since he was too interested in the TV at the moment.

* * *

"How do you feel today, Devlin?" said Mss. Gates

Devlin sat on the squishy chair in the counselor's office. It was Thursday, after school. The day he usually came to see Mss. Gates and talk. She'd made special arrangements to stay after school for as long as Devlin liked since during school was pulling him behind and bringing his grades a little low. As an excuse, Devlin said he was getting tutoring for his classes so Ben wouldn't ask questions.

"Fine. I guess." Devlin replied, tugging on his sleeves a little, a habit that stuck with him even though he hadn't cut in almost two months. He looked up at Mss. Gates to see the expression on her face. He couldn't quite make put what it was. She nodded and wrote something down on the clipboard.

'Taking notes…why does she take notes? Weird…' Devlin thought to himself while watching her. She finally looked at him and asked, "Did you do anything fun today?" Devlin couldn't help but roll his eyes and he replied with a small smirk, "It's school. Barely anything is fun."

"Barely? Is there an exception?"

There was a short pause before Devlin answered with, "Art class. And Music. Sometimes English, too."

"Are those your favorite classes?" Mss. Gates asked, writing things down and looking at him every once in a while. Devlin nodded and said, "I like Art and English better though. Mostly art, 'cause there's a lot of things to do. English is only fun when we get to write. Not the worksheets and other stuff."

"Why?"

"I guess…it's relaxing. It gets my mind off of things and I can express myself in different ways, with pictures and words." He replied without thinking at all. "Usually when I'm upset or bored I start doodling on my notebooks and ideas come in my head. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and I have to write or draw my ideas down or it just bugs me and I can't go back to sleep or can't concentrate all day." Devlin looked up at her and she wasn't writing anything down, so he guessed she already did or was too busy listening to him to even bother to write down notes.

"Well that's good. Has it stopped you from ever cutting?" Mss. Gates asked in an understanding tone of voice. Devlin didn't answer immediately, but thought over it. Had it stopped him? He remembered that he almost had a slip and wanted to. Maybe he was over cutting and found different ways to get rid of it all. He doubted it though. Not waiting for an answer, Mss. Gates wrote something down and put her pen down.

"Could we stop for today?" Mss. Gates nodded and Devlin got up and thanked her before leaving the room.

* * *

4:49 A.M

The bright red numbers glared in Devlin's eyes as he laid in bed that night. He sighed and pulled the covers closer to him. He shifted around curled up in a small ball until he was comfortable and warm in his blankets. Yawning he turned onto his other side, facing the wall and away from the numbers. He closed his eyes and slowed his breathing, hoping sleep would finally come. It'd been like this for the past few hours. Constant tossing and turning and sighing, waiting to fall asleep.

After a few moments, Devlin gave up and sat up in his bed. He rubbed his eyes and pulled on an over sized, black, zip-up jacket. He shivered a little as he got up from bed and the cold air enveloped him. He searched for a notebook and pencil before quietly going downstairs to the kitchen and turning on the light. He squinted at the light until his eyes adjusted and he sat down and opened the notebook. His drawing notebook. He was in an art mood for the night. He picked up the pencil and turned to a blank page and started sketching.

'_You think you can get rid of me so easily?' _

'I know I can get rid of you so easily.'

'_Such a smart-ass…and so naïve. You think a few pictures and poems would make you normal?' _

'Yes.'

'_He he…Oh, Devlin...you're just so…'_

'So…? Childish? Naïve? Weird? I guess I'm all of the above.' Devlin smirked to himself, the voice didn't answer back. He knew he won that argument and his smirk grew into a smile. He looked at the picture he was drawing, taking in what he subconsciously drew during his argument with The Voice. So far it looked like a girl, who was facing him sideways. She wore a dress that was torn and tattered, the sleeves ripped off, showing one arm as a corpse and the other normal. Her hair was waist length, tangled in an almost wet sort of way. Devlin thought before adding a pair of wings on her back, stretched out high as if getting ready for takeoff. He made the hair covering her face and angled it down as if she was looking at something. He then drew a tombstone and some flowers scattered next to it. He made small lines to indicating that it was raining and started drawing the ground.

"What're you doing up so late?"

Devlin couldn't help but yelp in surprise and hug his notebook to his chest closely, ignoring the graphite that would smear on his pajama shirt. He turned around and saw Ben standing there, staring at him with an expression Devlin couldn't figure out. He looked at the floor, already feeling the awkwardness between them. He still wasn't comfortable with addressing to Ben as 'Dad' even though he had told Devlin it was alright. Ben understood though. Devlin needed time to get used to having an actual family and Ben didn't mind waiting on him.

Devlin tensed a little as Ben walked over and sat down next to him, looking curiously at the notebook in his arms. "What's that?" he asked. Devlin could feel Ben's eyes locked on him, it was starting to make him nervous. He tried to avoid any eye contact with his adopted father whatsoever and kept his mouth shut. "It's ok, I won't bite." Ben said giving him a small smile.

"…"

"Is it a journal?"

"…"

"A…story?"

"…"

"Poetry?"

"…"

"Drawing?"

After a few moments Devlin gave a small nod. Ben nodded. "That's cool. I didn't know you were interested in art." He said and Devlin shrugged. "Could I see?" Ben added. After thinking it over, Devlin flipped the pages of the notebook until it was on the first page and handed it to Ben without saying a word. He didn't look up at Ben the entire time he observed the drawings and looked at his hands in his lap. He waited for Ben to make some remark about how much of a pansy Devlin was and telling him he sucked and hated his art. Surprisingly to Devlin, Ben said nothing. Every once in a while he would ask a question, a yes or no one since he knew Devlin didn't want to talk.

Finally after looking through all of them, Ben handed the notebook back and smiled at Devlin. "You're a really good artist." He said with an encouraging smile as Devlin took his notebook back and held it close to him again as if he were expecting Ben to take back from him.

'Is he just saying that or does he mean it? Is it only to get me to trust him? I'm so confused…' Devlin thought to himself. As if listening to his thoughts, Ben said, "I wasn't kidding either, you know. For your age, that's really good. Not many people can do that." Devlin nodded understandingly.

"Did you draw these free hand?" Devlin nodded again.

"Some are from looking at pictures…" he finally said in a small voice. He opened the notebook again to page that had of drawing of Toshiro from Bleach on it. "I found this on the internet and wanted to copy it. And this one too." Devlin explained and flipped to another page that was a forest scene with fog and mangled looking trees that gave it an eerie feeling to the picture.

Ben nodded and asked, "So then you thought of everything else?"

Devlin nodded. "From dreams mostly. Some are just random ideas. Some are just because I got bored and couldn't think of anything to do."

Ben nodded again and didn't say anything but looked like he was thinking about something. Devlin closed the notebook and held it close again. He pretended to yawn and rubbed his eyes like he was tired. "I'm going to bed now, goodnight." He said, turning around and quickly walking back upstairs to his room. He closed the door to his room and sat on his bed, holding his drawings close.

'I shouldn't have said anything…Oh god, he probably thinks I'm such a freak. Why did I say they were my dreams? Now he's going to tell everyone that I'm crazy or depressed or something, well… that's a little true, but still! Stupid, stupid, stupid! Damnit, Devlin! Why are you such a moron?' Devlin sighed as he mentally kicked himself and he put his notebook and pencil away in his backpack.

He ran a hand through his hair frustrated and sat down on his bed before taking off the jacket and laying down. He pulled the covers over his shoulder and curled into a fetal position and closed his eyes again. The bright red numbers on the alarm clock said that it was 5:59 A.M. Only a minute until he was supposed to get up and get ready for school. Hopefully Ben would let him sleep in and just come to school in the afternoon or something. Devlin yawned and rubbed his eyes, exhausted by now and closed his eyes. Finally, his breathing evened out and he fell into a much needed, deep, dreamless sleep.

**FIN! For this chapter at least. Haha…this one a lot longer than the rest. Plus it included Benji, who I thought needed some sort of father/son moment with Devvies. It should've been more…bond-ish between them. Oh well. I'll do that in another chapter. Once again, sorry this took so long. Busy schedule…So expect the next one to be possibly just as long. Once again and always, Review por favor! I'm outta here, PEACE!**


	5. Your Worst Nightmare

**Hmm…not really much to say. This one's short, 'cause I've been busy. I was gonna post this on Halloween, but I forgot.^^ HAPPY HALLOWEEN! Yes, it's late but it's my favorite holiday ^^. I'll say it as many times as I want! Only I didn't Trick Or Treat *sobs* I didn't have anyone to go with….. WHAT DID YOU DO FOR HALLOWEEN? POST IN YOUR REVIEWS!**

**Kurozaki****: No, they aren't bad at all. In fact, most of the dark drawings I've drawn are inspired by my dreams, and that's a lot. Yes, Ken is a caring bro/friend and Ben and Devlin moments are cute. Especially for me since I love the fact that Ben was nice enough to adopt Devlin. I noticed I'm very intrigued by adoption…**

**Bree Tennyson****: It's good to know I didn't fail that scene. While typing it down I thought it sounded so…emotionless and blah…but I'm glad to know that it wasn't. :D**

**Arianne 888****: Yeah, sorry again it took so long. I was busy. And yes, I'm in marching band and I play xylophone. Yeah, I decided to make him an anime nerd. It just seemed to fit him for me. He looks like someone who would to me. I love anime… And thanks, I was thinking that too. That's probably why I thought the moment sounded so boring to me. And I was actually thinking of something for Devlin's past. There are a lot of ideas though, so I'm still deciding. But yeah, I was going to put flashbacks every once in a while of his past in the story too. **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one. **

_It was dark. Just plain darkness, that was so quiet and still. Yet, eerie and bone chilling at the same time. Devlin felt like he was in some horror movie scene where a clown with a knife or something would pop out and scream at him. Instead, it was just quiet. He could barely see anything in the…wherever he was in or at. He looked around and took a step forward, eyes cautiously scanning around as best as they could in the darkness. As soon as he took that first step, a small light bulb hanging above him turned on, barely glowing and not really shedding any light on anything for Devlin to clearly see anything._

_He squinted and let his eyes adjust before trying to reach the bulb to use as a flashlight. At least he knew one thing; he was in a room of some kind. The outdoors wouldn't have light bulbs hanging down from the sky. Devlin grabbed the bulb by the string and held it out like a flashlight in front of him. He was in a hospital room with cheesy Halloween decorations, bats that were smiling at him, pumpkins with black cats and witches saying 'Happy Halloween', etc. Devlin looked around, confused. He turned the bulb to the hospital bed to find a woman lying there, hooked up to I.V's and a heart monitor that was starting to beep quietly. He walked towards her, taking small and cautious steps. She had skin that was even paler than his and really long blue-ish black hair that rested over her shoulders. Her eyes were closed but he already knew the color that they were, dark blue. Just like his. He already knew who this person was with just one look at her._

"_Mom…" he said in a whispered and shaky voice. Just then, the heart monitor went to a straight line and the 'beeeeeeee' noise and the crying of a baby filled the room. Devlin knew what day this was. One that he always hated ever since it happened. October, 31. His birthday. The day his mother died._

Devlin sat up in bed, gasping for air. His breath came out in panicked gasps as he clutched his blankets in one hand and the other to his chest. He felt the beads of sweat on his forehead and his body starting to shake violently in fear. His wide eyes scanning his room franticly as if checking to see if he wasn't in the hospital room anymore. He stared down at the dark grey blankets and clutched them with both hands, shivering from the cold and from the fear. It wasn't until he felt something wet drop onto his hands that he realized he was crying. With a shaky hand, he reached up and touched his fingers to his face, not bothering to wipe the tears away. He wrapped both of his arms around his knees and hugged them close to his chest and sat for what seemed like hours, sniffling quietly to himself.


	6. Schizophrenia

**KONICHIWA! Here's the next chapter of everyone's favorite anime loving, traumatized Levin boy! :DD As you can tell I'm hyper. I've spent all day making cookies and chocolate covered pretzels. Of course I might've had tiny bit of them as well, but that's another story! Anyways, so Christmas break starts on Friday for me and I'm pumped! During Christmas break I'll most likely write more because I'll be at my Grandma's place in Mexico, and that means I will have absolutely nothing to do. She's lives in the middle of nowhere and there's no internet and of course I have no phone service either :/**

**So that means I'll be sweating to death, eating none stop Mexican food, sketching, and thinking of ideas for fanfiction. I had a new idea so I'll let you, dear readers, decide if it's good. Here it goes:**

**For Devlin's twelfth birthday, he wants a dog. Kevin (this is an AU story) decides to take him to the animal shelter and tells him to pick out whatever dog he wants. It only figures Devlin would choose the biggest one there…**

**I'll let you guys decide if I should go through with this, because half of me is screaming yes, but the other half is like, 'maybe later..'. The idea popped in my head when I went to the shelter and saw a German Shepherd, which happens to be my dream dog, but my parents will only accept dogs when they're puppies. Sad face… ****Anyways, yeah. That's just about it. ^.^**

**Mazina: ****Thank youz! ^.^ Yes, he seemed like an October boy to me. Plus, I love Halloween so how awesome would it be if your birthday was on Halloween? I think it'd be bad ass… Why a rubber band? I understand that they're fun to play with, but why? WHY? Haha…I'm so crazy… **

**A BEN FAN benlie fan:**** Exactly what I was aiming for, MUHAHAHAHA!**

**Kurozaki: *****sniffles* I know… I actually teared up a little while writing that. They're in this chapter! I promise! DON'T YELL AT ME! *runs away sobbing***

**Arianne 888: ****It is cold, cold as my soul! Just kidding. Devlin's just so broken… poor child. Here's a cookie. *hands Devlin a cookie* Love the costume idea! I was gonna be Barrel from Nightmare Before Christmas, but no one would trick or treat with me. And yay flashbacks! I enjoy them as well… :D**

**Bree Tennyson: ****Thank you! I don't know what she died of… considering it was on his birthday and in the chapter there's a baby crying when her heart stopped, which was obviously Devvies, it was most likely child birth. But still sad… HAHA! That's epic! Emo clown and guy in a banana suit. Love it! XD**

**And now the moment you've been waiting for… CHAPTER 6! **

**Disclaimer: (see previous chapter)**

Devlin sighed as he stared up at the ceiling of his room. The only light was a Pumpkin Spice scented candle which was giving his room a soft orange glow and the sweet scent of pumpkin pie. He didn't care what Kenny said, Devlin loved it. Pumpkin Pie was his favorite, so much which instead of cake this year, Ben had bought a pumpkin pie for him and stuck twelve candles in it. Come to think of it, it was probably the birthday he ever had, well, the only birthday he ever had.

He adjusted the new Skullcandy buds in his ears and continued staring at the ceiling.

'_Miss me?'_

'What do want now?'

_Me? Want', _The Voice chuckled, _'What makes you think I want anything…?'_

'You always want something. What makes this any different?'

'_Well, well… What a snappy personality you've developed.'_

Devlin smirked to himself and closed his eyes, pleased with himself that he was able to stand up to The Voice for once. If things went like this for now on, he'd be normal in no time. Or at least what he considered normal. Normal people don't have voices in their head that insult them constantly. With a smile of content, Devlin rolled over on his side and pulled his covers over him. He was about to fall asleep when he felt his wrists stinging with pain.

Devlin opened his eyes as the pain got more intense and soon they felt like they were burning. A horrible stinging pain crawled up his arms and he felt something wet slide down them.

Devlin sat up fast, making the covers over him fall and his eyes widened at the sight. The scars were somehow open again, long, ragged, bright, angry red lines bleeding all over him and his sheets. The pain was horrible.

'_I don't like being talked back to…'_

Devlin wrapped his arms around his waist and shook his head furiously, making his spiky bangs swish from side to side.

"You're not real… you're not real…" He muttered his voice cracking.

'_I'm very real and you know it, whether you like it or not…'_

Devlin gripped his head in his hands, his entire body trembling in fear and panic as he realized that he was losing to The Voice again. 'Don't listen, it'll go away…' he thought to himself.

Everything went quiet.

Devlin opened his eyes and looked around his room, gasping for air as his dark blue eyes scanned his room frantically.

He sighed in relief as he heard no one but the sweet silence. His shoulders slowly slumped down and he let go of his head just as slow. He wrapped them around his waist again and took a long, shaky, deep breath.

He closed his eyes, tired from what just happened and lowered his head. Almost like that was a bad mistake, pain erupted on his arms and in his head, making him scream before he put his hand over his mouth and the other on his forehead in a weak attempt to stop the sudden pain.

It was like having someone smash his head with a frying pan and setting his arms on fire, making the cuts bleed all over again and run down his arms in little crimson rivers, slowly flowing to his elbows.

'_I don't like being ignored… Take this as a warning, kid. Next time you try to back talk me or cope an attitude with me, this will only get worse. I can make you hurt so bad, that you'll be begging me to stop. You'll wish you were dead and trust me, I won't hesitate to do so.'_

"W-who are you…? Why are you doing this…?" Devlin whimpered through the pain.

The voice laughed a haunting, musical laugh that made chills go down Devlin's spine and made him tremble.

''_Bout time you asked. My name is Vix. As for why I'm doing this,' Vix chuckled,'I'm here because you made me.'_

"What are you talking about? I want you gone!" Devlin let out another yelp as his pain only increased.

'_Do you really? You made me because you were lonely, remember? It was years ago, I'm sure you wouldn't remember. You wanted a friend so bad, someone who would listen to you and talk to you when no one else would." _Vix said.

Devlin shook his head again, "I don't care! I have that now, and I want you to leave me alone!" he said almost desperately.

'_Oh, Devvies… you honestly think that __**they'll **__be there for you like me? I'm with you all the time… When's Ben ever around, hm?'_

"He's busy, and he does acknowledge me. More than **he **ever did…" Devlin snapped back and groaned as more pain shot through his head.

'_And Kenny? You honestly think he'll be there? He has other friends, you know. Ones that he's known much longer than you. Sooner or later he'll get sick of you, it happens all the time. Both will, just like Kevin, like Shane, like Bridget…'_

Devlin shook his head at the mention of his father and foster parents that didn't want him. They'd left him at one time or another, hell, Kevin didn't want anything to do with him. Shane nearly killed him and put him in the hospital for weeks. Bridget almost put him in an insane asylum because he told her about Vix…

Vix laughed again before going silent and letting the pain subside, leaving Devlin sore from it all and to his thoughts.

'What if he's right…? Vix has never been wrong before…,' Devlin looked down at his blood dried arms and tears started to gloss his eyes, the familiar sting etching over them.

"Vix is always right…. Vix is always right…." He muttered to himself, letting the tears fall as he repeated the phrase over and over through anguished tears until he fell asleep.

**Wooo! Chapter 6 done!**

**I decided to give Vix a name, because I was sick of calling him THE VOICE all the time. For those of you who don't know, vix is Latin for scars, fitting, eh? I thought so… Plus, I wanted him back in the story to crush Devvie's hopes of getting better.**

**Honestly? This chapter was horrible, at least in my opinion and now I probably won't know what else to do. The question that I'm thinking is that Devvie should tell Ben about Vix in hopes that they could find some way to get rid of him. I'm not sure though, what do you guys think?**

**Anyways, yeah, that's it. Believe it or not, this chapter was inspired by lots and lots of Kingdom Hearts fics. Mmmm…. Roxas…. *Roxas fangirl in case you haven't guessed***

**It was also inspired by Brokencyde's song 'Schizophrenia'. It's so good, makes me want to go and beat someone's ass with a hammer. ^^**

**So click the button and REVIEW PLEASE!**

**~Ash =^.^=**


	7. My Bloody Valentine

**Hello, readers of this abomination I call a fan fiction, to another chapter of this fic. I'm sorry for not updating in forever, but things like reality kind of get in the way. Now as you all know Valentine's Day is tomorrow and this a very depressing story. So I've decided to make this a little happier, which is weird because I hate this holiday with a bloody passion. **

**Womfish: ****Thank you very much, I thought that I screwed chapter 4 up with that scene. I'm very glad I got lots of positive reviews on it.**

**A BEN FAN benlie fan: ****0.o Wow….um… that's one way to have a breakdown…. Thank you for the brilliant mind comment. Makes me feel special.. :3**

**Kurozaki: ****If it's one thing I've learned from mangas, it's that some twisted shit happens in A LOT of them, but you can't help but get hooked to the twisty… 0.o**

**Disclaimer: (see previous chapters because I'm too lazy to type everything out)**

"NO! Please, I'll do anything!"

"It's too late for that…"

"Kenny, please, I still have a full life to live, I'm too young! Spare me, please!"

"Oh, common Devlin, stop being so dramatic! Just get out of the bushes and let go of the fence and- get- in- the- SCHOOL!"

"NEVER! I refuse to step foot in that pink and heart covered hell! YOU CAN'T-"

Kenny slapped Devlin's cheek as hard as he could, hoping to knock some sense into the raven- haired boy. Unfortunately for Kenny, Devlin slapped him back as revenge and chuckled to himself.

"Get out of the bushes and common, dude." Kenny said impatiently and tugging on Devlin's arm while his other arm was gripped tightly around a fence pole outside the school.

"No. I'm not going in there… I'd much rather get mauled by a beaver then go in there…"

"It's just Valentine's Day, Devlin. It's not going to kill you-"

"LIIIEEESSS! All lies! It's the holiday of DOOMM!"

"…You need to stop watching Invader Zim, Dev. It's really getting to you."

"I love that show…" Devlin said with a small smile and Kenny finally distracted him enough to pry him off the fence and started dragging him to the school.

"I can see that…," Kenny said, looking at the black Invader Zim T shirt Devlin was wearing. Not to mention the various buttons pinned onto his backpack strap that he bought at some store in the mall that scared the crap out of Kenny.

"Look, you'll live, now common. I don't want to get another tardy and risk detention." Kenny said.

Devlin rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, "Please," he said, "You just want see who got you a stupid card in hopes of finding a girlfriend or a make-out buddy for the day…"

Devlin smirked as Kenny's tan face turned bright red.

"Victory for DEVLIIIN!"

"I rest my case…"

* * *

School had gone exactly how Devlin predicted it would, agonizing. The entire school was covered in red, white, and pin hearts, cupids, and other Valentine's Day decorations. The classroom was even worse, the desks decorated with different hearts and lacey frills hung off the corners of them.

Devlin took off the hearts on his desk and drew stitches, patches on them, or ripped them in half and colored them black. Yes, he hated this holiday with a bloody passion and looked around the classroom in utter disgust.

Everyone was all dressed in some kind of shade of red or pink, even Kenny, whose black stripe on his white shirt was now bright, sickly red. Couples were holding hands and hugging and kissing and all the other things in that nature. People were passing out their Valentine gifts around the classroom except Devlin, of course. He just sat at his desk reading a book called Godchild and a red sucker in his mouth. He looked up as yet another card was plopped on his desk with a candy attached to it. He put down his book and tore off the candy, separating it from the card and putting each into two separate piles. So far he only seemed to be paying attention to the candy.

"Still reading your backwards comic books?"

Devlin looked up at Kenny as he stood in front of him and held out a heart shaped cookie. Naturally, he accepted the cookie and took out his sucker so he could speak.

"It's called a manga, for your information. And yes, I am because it's better than getting some STD, unlike someone…" Devlin replied and reached out at Kenny and took his can of just opened soda and took a long sip before returning it back. Kenny rolled his eyes and sat down, munching on his cookie.

Devlin looked over at his desk which was absolutely covered in different cards and candies and overpowered Devlin's by a land slide.

'_That's a confidence booster…' _Devlin thought in his head but continued reading, the class party still going on.

Devlin finally made it to his locker, after pushing past all the couples in the hallway. The chains on his Tripp pants jingling as he walked and he let out a sigh of relief. Needless to say, he couldn't wait to get home and pig out on his candy stash and watch whatever wasn't romance related on TV and sulk like the single, emo boy he truly was… maybe not that last part, but the others, a definite yes.

He turned the lock, making it match the correct combination numbers. Once it was unlocked, he opened his locker and was met with a much unexpected surprise. There was a tall, medium sized box wrapped in red and black stripped paper with a black ribbon on the top. A single black rose was on top of the box, along with a small white envelope.

Devlin blinked and looked around, as if looking for the person who put the present in his locker.

"…How did they know my combination?" he asked himself out loud.

"You just got a present and all you can think about is how the heck someone was clever enough to get your combination?" Kenny said, incredulously at his friend. Devlin had forgotten that Kenny had followed him.

"Well, wouldn't you?" Kenny face palmed with a sigh and Devlin rolled his eyes and picked up the rose. He always liked black roses, much more interesting than the classic red even though black roses meant death. In this case though, he didn't mind. He'd never actually seen a black rose before, but now…

"So…you gonna open it, or…?" Kenny's voice trailed away as he watched Devlin smell the rose with his eyes closed. Then, Devlin smiled.

It wasn't the fake smiles he'd been giving out for the past few months, but an actually genuine smile of happiness, followed by a small laugh. Honestly, Kenny had gotten so used to seeing Devlin with a fake smile or with a frown, he was stunned to see him this way and was at a loss for words as he stared at his brother/best friend.

Devlin put all of his things in his locker and closed it, carrying his wrapped up box and still sniffing his rose. "Common, there's a marathon of Invader Zim and new episodes of Naruto that I'm not missing." He said, cheerfully. Kenny stared at him, still in awe of the happiness that was radiating off him.

Unknown to both boys, someone was watching from behind a corner with a small smile on their face and a bright red blush.

* * *

Later that night, Devlin was sitting on his bed and staring at his still unopened box, debating whether to open it or not. He was afraid that he'd ruin by opening it. He'd never gotten a valentine gift as surprising as this before, especially the flower which he was twirling in his fingers at the moment, stopping every once in a while to smell it. He loved the smell, it wasn't at all like a normal smell.

Strangely it smelled like an interesting mix of peppermint and vanilla, and he didn't know why, but every time he smelled it, he couldn't stop smiling.

He reached out to the box and set it on his lap, messing with the bow a little before finally deciding to open it, he carefully untied the bow and removed every piece of tape and folded the paper up into a neat square. This all took about five minutes, which made Christmas and his birthday agonizing for almost everyone.

Once the box was opened he smiled even more. It was like this person had been stalking him because it had almost everything he liked in it. There was a stuffed toy Diego, the bat from the Skelanimals a few more buttons to pin on his backpack strap, a green Invader Zim hoodie, the bottom and the hand cuffs being black, and the Irken insignia on the front, a pair of antennae were sewn on the hood and across the bottom on the back the show's logo was printed. The box also had a mixed CD of nearly every band that Devlin had liked, and finally the rest was filled with mangas. He smiled even more and hugged his box of presents before he remembered the card and reached for it.

Flipping it over and over, the only thing on it was his name written in cursive and a heart drawn next to it. He slowly opened it and pulled out the card. It was just plain black, no witty saying or picture, just black.

Devlin flipped it open, now even more curious and began to read the small note.

_Happy Valentine's Day,_

_I hope you enjoy the gifts. Something told me you might like it :)_

"Huh…weird." Devlin muttered to himself and set the card down on his nightstand, still smelling his flower and smiling to himself as he tried on his new hoodie and pinning his buttons on his strap, adding more buttons to his collection.

That night Devlin went to sleep with no nightmares, no Vix, and no depressed feelings. Just a smile, pleasant dreams and a peppermint and vanilla scented black rose laying next to him on his nightstand.

* * *

**NNYYYAAAHHH! How cute! XD**

**Ok, so I have no idea who his secret admirer is, and I didn't want to put any romance in this but now I think I'm having second thoughts…**

**I want a hoodie like that…**

**Reviews are what keeps me going! PLEASE PRESS THE BUTTON!**

**HAVE A HAPPY VALENTINE"S DAY!**

**~ Ash :3**


	8. Forbidden Friendship

**Hi people! I'm very pleased by the reviews from the last chapter, so thank you all to those who reviewed! So, I'm sorry if this chapter is kind of suck-ish, because the dreaded writer's block strikes again and has infected my mind with its… infectyness… Yeah… **

**So for inspiration for this chapter and for making me actually start writing it down, I thank the How to Train Your Dragon Soundtrack, more specifically the song 'Forbidden Friendship' because it's a beautiful piece of music and it nearly brings tears to my eyes every time I listen to it. It's what inspired me write this chapter and I suggest listening to it while reading a certain part, because it totally fits. At least I think it does.**

**Kurozaki: ****I like it when he's in a good mood, so there will be more of those moments and most likely less sad moments. YAY! :D**

**Bree Tennyson: ****CAN YOU FEEL THE LOVE TO-NIGHT!**

**A BEN FANbenlie fan: ****Your username is so confusing to type! DX Naaww….Devvies doesn't be such a sour puss…. And get that stick out of your ass while you're at it…**

**SoRinnegan: ****Me too, I was actually going to make that hoodie myself, but I don't have time at the moment… sad face. Actually, I'm starting to like yaoi, but certain times like when they're pouncing on each other is when I draw the line. I'm a more yaoi fluff kind of person :3**

**Arianne 888: ****It's ok, my Valentine's Day didn't go well either, well if yours didn't too… point is, yeah. Lol**

**Disclaimer: (see other chapters)**

* * *

After Valentine's Day, Devlin's mood had become much better and he was happier than what was the norm for him. He never really did find out who gave him the gifts, (**A/N: I'm keeping it a mystery, Muhaha!**) but he didn't mind. All he cared about was that he was finally happy.

As for Kenny and Ben, well, they were stunned, needless to say. Both were so used to the kid being moody and dark so the first day they saw Devlin with a smile on his face and not stopping his continuous chatting, it nearly scared them to death because only God knows the day Devlin was happy was when the apocalypse had arrived. Soon though, they slowly got used the fact. Ben was at least, it still freaked Kenny out that every morning he'd wake up to find Devlin making smiley face shaped pancakes in the kitchen.

It was nearly a month later and to Devlin's surprise, Vix hadn't shown up once. Although he wouldn't admit it, he was kind of starting to miss Vix's snappy comments and death threats. It was actually a little lonely without him around, especially the days he was home alone and had nothing to do or when it was late at night and Devlin was the only one awake and had nothing to do.

It wasn't like Vix just taunted him and made him feel like crap, he actually had meaningful conversations with the boy too. On rare occasions Vix helped Devlin cheat on tests and quizzes whenever the boy was stuck on a problem or question and it resulted in Devlin having almost all A's in all classes. Devlin actually kind of missed Vix's company and missed having the late night conversations with him. It was a complicated love/hate relationship and Devlin, even though he never ever would admit it to anyone, thought of Vix as a friend at times, a mean and fairly terrifying friend, but a friend nonetheless.

On this particular night, Devlin wished more than ever that Vix would come. He was sitting in his room on his bed and staring at his sketch book and thinking of what to do. He woke up late that night with a strong urge to draw something, but couldn't figure out what exactly to draw (**A/N: I hate those nights…**). Usually inspiration came from dreams and nightmares, but lately Devlin hadn't been having any dreams at all or he couldn't remember them at all. It was driving him insane and he really needed some inspiration at the moment.

'Vix? I could really use you right now, and I can't believe I'm actually saying this, but I sort of want to talk to you.' Devlin thought, in hopes of getting an answer from his frienemy. He waited a few moments, hoping for at least an insult, but nothing.

Devlin sighed, a little disappointed, and looked around his room. His gaze stopped and landed on his huge sketch book which he used for painting and an idea came to his head. He got up and grabbed the giant pad and walked as quietly as he could down the stairs and into the kitchen, setting the pad on the table and going over to the coat closet where he knew there was some paint and brushes. Who they belonged to, he didn't know and honestly didn't care because he claimed them as his since the paint looked like someone had barely even used them.

'_You called?' _(**A/N: Right now is where I'd listen to Forbidden Friendship)**

Devlin jumped a little and blinked, not expecting Vix to come up randomly in his head. 'Vix?'

'_Who else, kid? Santa?'_

Ignoring the comment, Devlin smiled and walked back over to the table. He set his things on the table and started pouring colors on a tray.

'_What do you want?'_

'To say hi. I haven't heard from you in a while.'

'_I don't see a reason for me to be around when you're not all depressed. It's no fun if you aren't, messing with your head, I mean.'_

'I missed you too.' Devlin laughed a little. He dipped his brush in some colors and started mixing red and blue until he had a dark purple color.

'…_.so… What'd you really want me for?'_

'I just said. I wanted to talk to you, believe it or not, I was kind of starting to wonder if you left or not.'

Vix stayed silent for a long moment and Devlin continued to mix colors until he had the right shade and applied it to the paper in long brush strokes, covering it in dark purple and mixing in some blue, black, or green every once in a while. 'Vix?'

'_Yeah?'_

'Why don't we have more conversations like this? At least ones where you don't insult me all the time, just ones where you're actually nice to me.'

'_Because it's my job to make you miserable and I love seeing you miserable and in pain…'_

Devlin could instantly tell that he was lying by the playful tone that Vix had suddenly adopted. One thing that Devlin learned about Vix was that he could change moods in an instant. Especially lately whenever Vix was actually around.

Devlin added more paint onto the paper until it was fully covered in the mix of dark colors. It was mostly black but had a splash of color every few places and blended nicely together. He cleaned the brush and dipped in the white paint, making a big circle on that paper and blending the colors just right so that it matched the background color. Once he was done with that he added shading to it and when he was finished, it almost resembled the moon, but it was still pretty close.

'_You're actually getting pretty good at this stuff, you know that?' _There was something in Vix's voice that sounded a little strange to Devlin. It almost sounded like he had a hint of pride in his tone.

'Thank you, but it's not as good as I wanted it to be…'

'_Perfectionist…'_

Devlin smiled again. He took his brush and dipped it into more paint and he started going over the paper in short, delicate strokes. The brush seemed to glide over the paper as he drogue it across, making a straight line that looked like a path that was heading to the horizon where the moon was. The path was a light grey color and on the sides of the path, he started making bare trees with branches and twigs looking twisted and mangled and as creepy as he could make them, using long and short strokes to get as much detail as he could.

'Vix? Do you ever wish you weren't just a voice in my head?'

'_Why do you ask?'_

'Just wondering.' Devlin replied simply and waited for Vix to answer.

'_Sometimes… I want to actually experience the world on my own and not through you. It's not like it matters though, It most likely won't ever happen.' _

'Hmm…' Devlin thought to himself and dipped his paintbrush again, this time making something on the path. He shaped it like a human, the back facing. At first, it was just the pale color of the skin. He waited for it to dry before dipping the brush in black and painting on the person's hair, a little shaggy and long with it ending at almost the shoulders. He painted on a black trench coat/cloak sort of jacket, the bottom flowing as if there was wind as well as a large sort of hood. Simple jeans were painted on next in a dark blue color and darker shading added next. Next were calve high boots with light grey buckles on the sides and fingerless gloves on the hands that were black. Devlin then took his brush and dipped it in the black again, this time using to paint small, black bat-like wings on the person's back that were spread out ward as if the person were about to take flight. He tried to make the ends a little tattered and torn to give it a creepy sort of feeling to match the rest of the picture.

'_Is this anyone in particular?'_

'Yeah. You.'

'_Me? Why would you draw me?'_

'Well, if you were actually a person, this is what I imagine you to look like. I know, kind of stupid, but whatever.' Devlin shrugged as he added a few more touches. A little more shading, some light reflecting from the moon he had painted and next he added some small wisps of what were clouds that were gliding over his moon like what you'd see in horror movies. The dotted the sky with small white dots, stars and lots of them behind the clouds and around the moon.

Finally, he was finished. He sat back and examined the work, eyes going over and scanning it and ready to catch any mistakes. He was actually quite proud of his work and was pleased to see it all play out well. The dark sky and the trees mingled nicely together, giving a sort of dark emotion to the whole piece.

'_I don't understand…'_

'You don't have to. You were my art subject, it's nothing really. I just felt like drawing you if you were a human.'

'…_Am I what you would call… a 'friend'?'_ Vix sounded hesitant at he said that, like he'd never heard the word before or never even said for that matter. It was like he was speaking a foreign language almost.

Devlin paused a little before answering, 'Yeah, in a way. Other than the constant bashing on me, I kind of enjoy you being around. It's better than having no one at all and you said you've been with me for a while, so why not?

'_So we are friends?'_

'Yeah.'

'…_Friend…' _Vix almost whispered and Devlin nodded slightly. 'Yeah, that means no more death threats and less teasing. This means being a little nicer now, think you'll survive?'

Vix scoffed, 'Of course I can. Are you forgetting who you're talking to?'

Devlin laughed and yawned a little, feeling tired and got up, leaving his picture and supplies on the table and heading to the living room couch and grabbing a blanket on the way. He laid down on it, adjusting the pillow and turning onto his side with a yawn and closing his eyes.

"Goodnight, Vix."

'_Goodnight…friend.' _

* * *

'_Number seven is D.'_

'Did I mention how much I love having you tell me all the answers?'

'_You're welcome.'_

Devlin finished the last few problems on his own and turned the test he was working on, finishing early he now had at least twenty minutes to spare until his next class.

'_Devlin?'_

'Yes?'

'_Have you ever told anyone about me?'_

'No, actually. Not even Kenny knows about you and he knows about the scars…' Devlin subconsciously scratched his arms underneath his sleeves. 'Why?'

'_I'm just wondering, that's all.'_

'I see… any reason as to why?'

'_Well… I was thinking…. Ever since that painting, I was wondering, if it were possible, I mean, that I could have my own body and not see life through someone else. Experience it on my own, you know…?'_

'What you're saying… is that you want to be human?'

'_Exactly. Is there a spell or something, anything?' _Vix almost sounded desperate at this point.

'I'll see. When we get home, alright?'

'_Thank you.'_

* * *

**There you have it, I just barely thought of Vix being a good guy and being friends with Devvies, but hey, I'm a sucker for these kinds of twists.**

**R&R please!**

**~Ash**


	9. Welcome to My World

**I couldn't help it, I had to write more. I'm so glad you guys didn't think the last chapter was bad, because truth be told I wrote that at like two in the morning and I was kind of running on a few hours of sleep. So yay! This might also not be very good, because right now I'm watching Jackass and it's being very distracting… but oh so funny.**

**SoRinnegan: ****Yup, he's a good person…most of the time. :)**

**Arianne 888: ****Thanks, and this chapter is the answer to your question. Be happy, I'm staying up uber late on a school night when I have super important tests to do the next morning just I can update to you guys… lucky people..**

**Kurozaki: ****I don't think he does… Yo, Vixxy! Do you like huggles? *Vix hisses in the background*… I'm guessing that's a no… Oh well, HUGS FOR VIXXY!**

**Disclaimer: For the love of god these things are annoying when you have to repeat yourself! I OWN NOTHING!**

_Small and quiet sniffles filled the tiny and dark closet, engulfing the small five year old in a strange comfort as he sobbed quietly to himself. His foster parents were arguing again, he could hear both of their voices getting louder and more insults being tossed back and forth as more and more colorful language was being added in. The strong smell of cigarettes floated upstairs to where the boy's room was. Being in the closet lessened it so he wouldn't nearly choke on the smoke and it served as a sort of safe haven from the chaos downstairs._

_Devlin Levin had never liked it when people yelled, whether it was directed toward him or not. To him, yelling meant he had done something wrong or someone was angry with him. Yelling usually brought tears and tears brought on pain which came in many different forms. He was usually left with dark bruises and several cuts. He knew those would heal in a matter of time, but his heart was shattered. Even at a young age he knew broken hearts took a very long time to heal, sometimes they wouldn't heal at all. _

_He heard glass being shattered, most likely from being thrown against the wall. The boy couldn't help but flinch at the sound and scoot his small body deeper into the closet, wrapping his small, bruised-covered arms around his knees and burry his face into them to continue his quiet sobs. As the voices got louder, he shut his large, dark blue eyes and covered his ears with his small hands in a feeble attempt to shut out the voices from downstairs. Wishing it would all just go away and wanting to be somewhere where people were nice to each other and him, the young Levin child continued to let the tears fall._

'_Hey, what's with the tears, kid?'_

_Eyes snapping open, Devlin looked around the closet, his heart racing with slight fear. He knew nobody was in there, who would be? He sniffled and rubbed his tear filled eyes and in a quiet and a little scared voice he said, "Who're you…?"_

'_I'm not going to hurt you, alright? I just want to talk. I know you do too.'_

"_Why should I believe you…?"_

'_Good question kid. The real question is do you trust me?'_

"_Who are you…?"_

'_I'm what you would call…a friend. Someone to talk to when you get lonely or at times like these when you need someone.'_

"_Do you have a name?" Devlin sniffed and wiped his cheeks off, becoming more relaxed as he talked on. _

'_My name is Vix…'_

"_Do you know who I am?"_

'_Yes.'_

_As the night went on, Devlin quietly talked to Vix for a few more hours and sure enough the arguing and fighting slowly died down. Around one A.M Devlin finally started to get tired and yawned, his eyes shutting slowly but he'd force them back open._

'_Go to sleep, it's kind of late anyways.'_

"_Are you leaving?" the small child's voice had sadness laced all over it._

'_No, I'm not leaving. I'll be here and don't worry about those monsters downstairs, if they come upstairs I'll wake you up."_

"_Promise?"_

"_Promise. Goodnight."_

"_Goodnight Vix…"_

**(What a lovely line, no?)**

'How did I forget about you though?" Devlin asked as he settled himself to a more comfortable position on his bed. Vix was telling him how they first met, since Devlin still had questions as to why he couldn't remember ever having Vix with him other than now.

'_Remember that one foster family you went to? The dad's name was… um… Shane! That's it…' _Vix said, recalling that Shane was the reason Devlin didn't remember him.

'Didn't he put me in the hospital? And then after that I went to a new home?' Devlin recalled waking up and not exactly remembering what had happened to him.

'_Yes. You see, you came home late one night, and that was my fault because I convinced you to stay after school for tutoring, anyways… Shane got mad at you and so he, you know,-'_

"_Yeah I get it. Go on."_

'_Anyways, he kind of threw you down the stairs and you sort of fell kind of hard. You hit your head on the landing and got a pretty bad concussion. The doctors said that it made you lose a few memories and that included me. That was when you were nine.'_

"So then why didn't you talk to me until now?"

'_I won't lie, I was pretty bummed out that you couldn't remember me. I just shut myself off from you and let myself wallow in misery. Then you found Kenny and became friends with him, and… I got jealous.'_

"Jealous? For what?"

'_I was your best friend, ever since you were five and then that overly tanned and way too spoiled brat comes along and tries to take my place? Oh, hell no…' _Vix's voice turned bitter and angry, obviously indicating he still didn't like Kenny that much and not bothering to try and hide it. He sighed and went on, his voice changing to a softer, more guilt-filled tone. _'I guess I just got so angry and jealous that I forgot I was hurting you. I let my anger get in the way and it took over me. I'm sorry… I hold bad grudges…'_

'It's ok, Vix. I get it, you just don't want to share my friendship with anyone else. You do know that you can't just be my only friend, right?'

Vix grumbled and reluctantly replied with a grumbled 'yes'. _'I know I sound possessive, but it feels like your trying to get rid of me…' _he added.

'You know I wouldn't. You'll always be my first friend. No one can replace that.' Devlin almost laughed at what he had just said. It was surprising how close he and Vix had gotten over just a few weeks. It was a little weird and he was still getting used to the fact that Vix wouldn't randomly threaten him or make his scars bleed. If Vix could smile, he would've been at that moment. There was a slight pause as Devlin's IPod changed to a new song and filled the room through the giant surround sound speakers that he'd gotten at Christmas. The first few measures of an acoustic guitar filled the room with a slow-ish and sad feel to it before the singer began.

'Hey Vix?' Devlin asked after a few more moments of silence between the two was beginning to bug him.

'_Hm?'_

'What exactly are you? I mean, I know you can't just be something I thought up randomly.'

'_I knew you'd ask this sooner or later…' _Vix stayed silent for a moment as he tried to think of the right words to say. _'It's kind of hard to put into words…'_ Devlin waited patiently anyways.

'_Have you ever wondered where nightmares or bad luck or phobias or things like that ever come from? Or have you ever thought about how sometimes angels aren't so angelic sometimes?'_

'I'm going to be honest with you, no I haven't…'

'_Sometimes angels get a little messed up. Instead of being full of light, they come from the darkness that comes from other people's thoughts, emotions, or dreams. That's why there are angles of darkness, but sometimes those angels get even more caught up in the dark and all the bad things that happen in the world. These are what you would call demons, they're a more evolved version of a dark angel. Completely made of darkness and anything foul and vile in the world. Demons like to seclude themselves and wonder around by themselves, making peoples' live hell. That's what I am, a demon except now I doubt it.'_

'What do you mean?' Devlin asked and shifted to a more comfortable position on his bed.

'_A true demon wouldn't forget its purpose and wouldn't become friends with a 'victim'. So this is what they meant by defective…' _Vix mused to himself and his voice trailed off like he was thinking of something else.

'Defective? What do you mean?'

'_It's nothing really. I've been told I wasn't like the other demons numerous times. They said I was a defect. I was actually capable of feeling, had emotions. Demons are only supposed to be empty shells of evil who take pleasure of hurting and destroying. I was never like that, I knew when enough was enough, when the victim had had enough and I'd just leave and go on. Obviously no one thought my actions were very demonic.'_

'Does that bug you? That you're different from the rest?'

'_Nah, I gave up on caring about they said a long time ago.'_

'How old are you?'

'_What? That has nothing to do with this at all…'_

'I know, but I'm just curious.'

Vix laughed a little. _'1,726. I'm still considered a child in Demon years.'_

Both human and demon laughed, their vices being covered by a guitar solo that engulfed the entire room in the middle of the night.

**So this was more of a filler/informational kind of chapter in the story. I just had to clear some things up, especially what Vix is. That idea came to me while watching a mixed marathon of Danny Phantom and Invader Zim. Don't ask…**

**R&R please!**

**~Ash**


	10. Hospital Beds

**Hello again! Before I begin…..**

**I'm very, very, very sorry for the what, eight month wait, on this chapter. I had things going on, I kept re- writing and re- writing this chapter, and extreme writer's block, of course. I don't want to just type something up in like five minutes, call it good and just post it. That's not cool, I want to make it worth your wait and if it isn't I'm terribly sorry…**

**Now I don't know about you guys, but the last chapter I wrote, well in kinder terms, sucked. :/ That was one of those 'do- in- five -minutes –after- writing –the- last- chapter- and –upload- in -the –same- day' situations, which was kind of stupid. That's fine though, because I hope this one will make up for it! I was kind of getting stuck on what to do next and how this is going to go down any further. But I think I solved it now, if not then I'm screwed. *prepares shot gun***

**Before I forget, check out my drawing of Vix here please, and tell me what you think: **

**http: / / jukimu11. Deviantart .com / # / d3d391u (take out the spaces :D)**

**Arianne 888:**** Thanks; I don't get to know how I did on those tests until summer, which the results haven't come in yet though. I hoped I passed; it'd be quite bothersome if I had to re-take them again next year. Haha, yes the flashback is something I enjoy to, flashbacks come in handy with things like that. ^.^**

**Kurozaki: ****Ah, yes. Vixxy-chan is really just a big, cute softy underneath the fact that he can make people go insane, I want him to be like the guy who looks scary at first and seems like a hard ass, but is really just a nice dude, if that makes sense. :D**

**Disclaimer: why do I do these, anymore? You all know the drill by now.**

Needless to say, school wasn't an enjoyable place for an eleven year old kid who could hear voices and had alien powers. If anything, school was hell for the young Levin child. At first, it seemed fun. Easy even, despite he hadn't gone to a school before, but he soon changed his mind after the first week. In that time span he got to know the real wonders of school, the monotone voices of Math teachers, the noisiness of the class that was after their lunch break, and, oh yes, he would never forget his first encounter with the type of teacher that everyone hated. The strict, angry teacher.

In this case, it was Devlin's science teacher, Mr. Zeller. He was a bald, obese man who sat behind his desk all hour, eating micro waved TV dinners (you can imagine how the room smelled) and stunk badly of an odor that can only be described as 'cat piss'. He didn't like most kids, just the ones that were involved in any kinds of sports. Ironic because the guy looked liked he hadn't done any physical activity in years. But the person he hated the most was, of course, Devlin. Maybe it was the dark clothes, the constant day dreaming that he did in class, or the time that he accidently stabbed the older man's finger with a scalpel during a lab once, all Devlin knew was that the back of his head was receiving death glares every time the teacher went to sit at his desk at the back of the room.

There were some things that he enjoyed about school though. Even though he was transferred during the middle of the school year, he was already ahead of most of the other students by a few chapters in almost every class. He always looked forward to his art class, but didn't like how there was the lack of expression in the projects. When the class would be turning in sketches of a city landscape, Devlin would turn in something completely different like a twisted, dark design of a forest or a graveyard with some skeleton hands popping up from out of the dirt. This was why he was getting sent to the counselor's office more often. Apparently expressing how he truly felt was 'concerning and unnatural'.

"_Humans these days… I swear, your species gets weaker and weaker as the years go by. You can't even get disciplined anymore! What the hell is sitting in a room for a whole hour is going to teach you? I remember when kids used to get beaten with sticks for using foul language to an elder…"_

Devlin absent mindedly listened as Vix ranted on his mind as he walked through the nearly empty hallways of the school. After spending another counseling session after school, it was a little late for anyone to be in the building, only janitors cleaning the trash that students left behind. He was offered a ride home after his session, but already feeling like he was taking too much of her time, he insisted on walking. _"You should have taken that offer. I don't feel like walking all the way to that sky scraper you call a home."_ Vix complained in his head.

"You're not even walking, for one thing. Besides, I like walking and if something happens I can defend myself. I've had enough experience in that." Devlin replied once they were out of the building and no one was around to hear or see him talking to himself.

"_Which leads me to wonder, since Ben Tennyson, savior of the universe and blah, is now your parental figure, and Hell knows the Tennyson's are basically royalty around this place, Kenny practically flaunts it around… Wouldn't that mean you would have a lot more enemies around?"_

"What do you mean?"

"_There are a lot of people out there who really don't take a liking to Ben, so he's bound to have a few people who would use you to get to him. Plus, there's tons of people who hate your biological dad who could go after you and possibly beat the crap out of you with no remorse and just leave you in an alley to die where the rats would-"_

"Ok! I got it, thanks." Devlin sighed, "I think my paranoia just went up about eighty times more… But you're right. I should probably be more careful, but it's not like I'm defenseless. I can fight back, too, without using my powers…" Devlin trailed off and looked down at the ground thoughtfully. Vix had a point, what if one of these days he was jumped by a gang while he was walking home? He had to be more careful, no matter how much experience he had with fighting he knew that he could still easily be beaten.

"_Ah, don't worry about it. I'm just pointing it out there, that's all" _Vix said in a some-what more gentle voice. Truth was, he didn't want his body host to get hurt by anything or anyone. Only he was allowed to do that! But he was improving in trying not to ever since the truce the two had made.

By the time they were half way home, it was already beginning to get dark. Devlin cursed under his breath and tried to walk faster, only to trip and nearly twist his ankle and Vix laughing at him for about fifteen minutes. He was wishing he took that ride offer now.

Probably not the smartest thing to do that night was to take a short cut through some alley ways. There's a reason why parents tell their children not to go in those. Apparently Devlin never listened, because he had already walked straight through three of them without second thought about the consequences. So much for being more careful.

Upon entering one alley way, Devlin could barely make out where he was going but he kept his guard up for anything, just in case. An odd feeling began to build up inside him, like he knew he was walking straight into trouble, but his mind (not Vix) kept telling him to keep going, that he would be fine. The alley looked like something that would be seen in a mobster movie. The brick walls were old, falling apart, or covered in some kind of stain that could've been anything. Several pieces of trash littered the ground, especially when there was a dumpster that was overflowing with bags of smelly filth. A stray cat would run away once Devlin got to close to where it was every once in a long while. After getting half way through, Devlin started to relax, which was the first mistake of the night.

Once Devlin let his guard down, things just started going downhill. When he saw that everything seemed ok, he relaxed thinking that he would have nothing to worry about for the rest of the way. A door on one side of the alley opened, light streaming briefly into the darkness, but was blocked as a few staggering men hobbled out of the doorway, talking and laughing loudly about something that Devlin didn't quite understand. They reeked of alcohol; Devlin knew that familiar smell from when his foster parents would drink, and they dressed in dark, baggy clothing and had blue bandanas wrapped around their arms and several tattoos that had some odd symbol, an immediate sign that they were most likely involved in a gang. The first thing that went in Devlin's mind was hide, but upon looking around for somewhere to hide, there was nothing. Not even a cardboard box

Shit.

The second thing he thought of, run. But that would possibly make them notice him and there was nowhere to run to. 'Fuck, I'm screwed…' he thought to himself. 'Alright, don't panic. Panicking just lets you lose focus. Maybe if I just turn around quietly they won't notice… They are drunk…'

With that thought in mind, Devlin turned around slowly and as quietly as possible, tried to get the hell out of there. He took a few soft steps away before he felt his hair getting tugged, painfully, and feeling his body crashing against a hard, sold figure. He felt a hand reach up and start to stroke his hair in a lazy, uncoordinated way.

"Hey, girl, where ya goin'? You not gonna say hi to us…?" The voice was slurred and the breath smelled horribly of whiskey. Devlin glared and tried push himself away saying, "Get the fuck off me, and I'm not a boy, not a girl so back off." The person who was holding him just tightened his grip in way that Devlin knew he was going to get a bruise later on.

"Nah, girl, you have such nice, long hair… You must be a girl-", the guy was interrupted as Devlin elbowed his captor in the stomach, hard enough to get out of the person's grip. He spun around, not wanting his back turned to a few drunken gang members who obviously wanted something more than a drink. "Get the hell away from me…" he hissed threateningly. The sinking feeling he had was beginning to grow by this point at a very unsettling rate. And where the hell was Vix in all of this? Shouldn't he be here by now, at least giving Devlin some advice?

"Yo, bitch! You're gonna pay for that ya know? Get your ass back here!" another of the gang members called out, walking forward with the others following closely behind. Acting on pure instinct, Devlin turned around and ran, sprinting for the other side of the alley or some kind of escape. He could hear angry and slurred shouts behind him, but they sounded way too close for his liking.

'Where's the exit? Why does it feel so far away now? Fuck, I'm screwed… I'm so fucking dead!' Devlin thought, hoping for something to happen, anything, even a simple, smartass comment from the voice in the head was good enough for him. He could feel his heart pounding furiously in his chest, he thought it would explode. The sense of fear that he'd been trying to keep down was beginning to reach its boiling point and Devlin was starting to panic. Should he scream? That would draw attention. Should he try and fight? He was much outnumbered. In every situation in his mind he only got one ending for him. And it wasn't at all a good one.

Before he knew it, Devlin skidded to halt, coming to a dead end where there was a wall in front of him. Where the hell did that come from? "But of course… clichés like this always have to happen at the worst of times…" he muttered to himself. He took a deep breath and sighed. He was screwed either way, no matter how he saw it. "Might as well go out fighting." He said to himself, turning around and waiting for whatever was about to come. When he heard the shouts getting closer, he made his decision. Fight, just fight and whatever happens, happens. He made a fireball in each of his hands, using the Heatblast powers from his much hated mutant form and waited for his fate.

When he saw the first sign of one of the gang members, he blasted at them. Hoping that it would scorch them to death, but luck was never on his side. The guy somehow managed to break through the flames and lunged straight at him, something glittering in the faint light that he held in hand. Devlin guessed it was a knife of some sort, making a mental note to stay the hell away from it at all costs. The guy slashed and jabbed at Devlin, missing most of the time from intoxication. Devlin barely managed to move out of the way, a few times having his sleeve ripped in different parts. He conjured up some fire and once successfully burned one member who shrugged it off after about a minute and went back into the fight. By now the poor eleven year old was circled, managing to get some hits in and trying to dodge knives, kicks, and punches. He was doing a fairly nice job of it, too. Trying not to get distracted, he gave one person a roundhouse kick in the jaw and catch one person's punch. He grabbed the fist in his hand and pulled it back its owner's back, putting a foot on his back and pulling on both arms until he heard a loud snap that echoed throughout the alley walls, following a pain filled scream. He smirked in satisfaction, feeling that maybe he was wrong about this, that he could actually succeed and come out without a scratch and go home, the situation a distant memory of his.

Pain exploded on his left side, breaking his train of thought. Instinctively, he wrapped an arm around his torso, forgetting where he was and focusing his attention on his wound. In a matter of seconds, he felt more punches and kicks landing on his body, his legs being kicked out from under him and making him fall on his back, knocking the breath out of him. He felt more kicks to his sides, his legs, everywhere that was exposed. Pain was everywhere and it was at the point where it was unbearable enough to wish for death to come quickly or at least to pass out. Devlin could see different colored spots dance across his vision behind his closed eyes, he could feel something warm trickle down his forehead and the sharp sting of something going across his body at different places, mostly his face and arms. He opened one eye just enough to see that one guy was slashing him with a knife, another had…was that a gun? He heard a click and his suspicions were confirmed.

He shut his eyes tight, praying that they'd at least shoot his heart or head and make it a quick death, but when heard nothing happening, he opened his eyes again. Vision blurred, he looked around and saw a flash of red and the bodies, at least what was left of them, of his attackers. They were scorched, literally burned to a crisp and nothing but almost a pile of ashes. He could make out a figure standing in front of him, clad in black and two odd objects protruding out of the figure's back. The person muttered a few words in a language that Devlin couldn't figure out and turned its head around to face him. His vision went out of focus and darkness was beginning to block his sight, but before completely falling into the dark oblivion, he could make out a pair of bright, yellowish green eyes.

**(This right here would be line break, it's lovely, no? Line break likes to be fabulously lovely)**

There was a constant beeping noise that was right next to Devlin, it was annoying him to no end. Was that his alarm clock? It wasn't stopping and Devlin was ready to throw the damn thing across the room. He felt something underneath him that was, not exactly the most comfortable thing in the world, soft and he felt something thin that was covering his body half way, keeping him somewhat warm. He could feel a light burning his eyes, even though they were closed and he let out a small groan and tried to lift his arm to cover his eyes, but it felt so heavy and stayed where it was.

'Where am I…?' he thought to himself, but almost instantly the memories flashed in his head, walking home, the gang members, the pain, and the black figure. 'Who was that? Or maybe… what was that?' he thought again to himself while opening his eyes a little only to be blinded by a very bright light that was over him. Once his focus was back, he looked around the room and felt his heart sink. A hospital room. Devlin absolutely hated hospitals. The room was a pale blue, almost white, and had white and gray tiled flooring. There were a few chairs in the room, empty ones next to his bed, and several machines next to his bed all connected to him by a few wires.

After taking in his surroundings, Devlin then decided to look at himself and see how much damage there was. Bracing himself, he looked down and, from what he could see, was slightly relieved. His right arm was wrapped up in bandages, a little bit of blood seeping through in some spots, his other arm had just a few patches of gauze taped on some cuts, nothing too bad. His examination was cut short by the sound of someone clearing their throat next to him. Devlin turned around and his eyes widened to about ten times their size.

Next to him was a boy, about his age, but there was something was completely different about him. He had tall, knee high black leather boots that had silver buckles along the sides that shined in the fluorescent light. His pants were black, ripped on the thighs and on one knee and looked a little tight, two silver studded belts criss-crossed each other to form an X around his hips. He had a dark red v necked shirt, a silver skull pendant rested on his chest by a silver chain around his neck along with a black, spiked choker. He had on a long, black trench coat that went down to his knees and seemed to flow around like shadows. His hands were covered with black, fingerless gloves and his nails were as black night. Protruding out of his back were a pair of small, but still noticeable, black bat-like wings that fluttered or stretched out before folding back along his back. He was pale skinned, as pale as Devlin, and his hair was black, bangs covering one eye, dyed a dark but still noticeable red at the ends, and the back, also dyed red, was spiked up. He had a slightly bored, almost expressionless face and his eyes were a startling, bright yellow but had some green mixed in, giving them an odd, luminescent color to them.

What startled Devlin the most was his face. Other than the eyes and hair, it was an exact copy of Devlin's face.

The other Devlin gave a heart hearted wave and said, his voice exactly like Devlin's but more bored sounding, "Hey."

Devlin blinked as his mind tried to conjure up something to say. 'Hey'? How was he supposed to reply to that when the person that said looked exactly like him?

"Who are you…?" he finally said, sounding more freaked out than he wanted to and mentally kicked himself. The other Devlin raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms. "You forgot me already? And here I thought friends were supposed to care…"

Devlin just stared at his clone in confusion. He didn't even know this person, was he mental? What was going on?

The other Devlin smirked, enjoying the fact that the 'original' was having his mind blown to bits right now. "I'll give you a hint," he said, "I used to be in your head. Literally."

Devlin thought about this for a moment before it finally dawned onto him. 'He's joking right? That's not even possible!' he thought before saying his thoughts out loud.

"…Vix?"

"The one and only." He replied with a grin, revealing two, pointed fangs.

**So I really hope this was worth it for you guys, especially afte such a long wait. ^^**

**I'm not sure when the new chapter will be up, but I promise it wont be so incredibly long like this time. I have other fics to write more chapters on too, so you guys aren't the only ones who I sort of left hanging. ^^'**

**Leave me a review and not only will I keep writing, but I will also give you a virtual cake! ^.^**


End file.
